Are You ‘Cautiously’ Optimistic About Life?
October 14, 2011 by Michelle Cantrell
Filed under Mind & Body, Self Esteem & Motivation
The other day I told someone that I had applied to graduate school and that I was “cautiously optimistic” that I would get in. We hear that phrase a lot: “cautiously optimistic”. We think something good might happen, but we don’t want to get our hopes up in case it doesn’t work out. Seems like a pretty good stance to take on future outcomes, right?
Now I’m not so sure. Why should I be cautious with my optimism? Why can’t I just be optimistic outright? Yes, holding back on optimism is a way of protecting ourselves from disappointment, but by expecting less than the best from our futures are we shorting ourselves on the power of hope?
Just because I am optimistic doesn’t mean I am not being realistic. I am well qualified for the graduate program to which I have applied, and feel that I would make an excellent student within the program. But I know that there may be more well qualified people than openings in the program, and regardless of my expectations, I will be disappointed if I am not admitted into the program. Being cautious about my feelings really won’t provide much buffer against that disappointment, and the reality is, disappointment is a part of life. It’s how we learn to grow, adapt, change, and find new paths. It is not something to shield ourselves from, but instead channel into something purposeful.
How do you approach your future? Do you live your life expecting the worst to avoid being let down or do you open your hear to the endless possibilities life holds for you?
I want to piggyback on your comment about disappointment helping us to learn, grow, adapt, change and find new paths. This is SO true for me right now. Having been hit right between the eyes with one of the biggest “disappointments” in life a woman/wife/mother can be hit with – her husband leaving and initiating a divorce – I have found that this entire experience has been about those VERY things. I have grown…adapted…changed in more ways than I am aware and certainly am on my way to finding my new path…and I have to admit, its exhilarating! No one WANTS to go through something like this…however I have to say there IS a silver lining. I have learned SO much about myself and have found a new identity, in a way. I have an amazing wellspring of strength – and I don’t know fully where it comes from.
So I am throwing all caution to the wind these days…I am trying to remain open to ALL things in life, good and bad. Because the difficult things we experience in life DEFINITELY help us to grow stronger. I don’t want to miss out on those opportunities!
Felicia, I continue to admire your amazing strength and personal insight. You really are an inspiration and a role model in so many ways!
I chase my dreams, no matter how unrealistic they are. I hope for the best but prepare for the worst just in case.
Nothing wrong with being prepared as long as it doesn’t undermine hope. Way to go Ashley!
I don’t let the downs of today deter me from pursuing tomorrow. In fact, it is often the downs the propel me to make proactive decisions to change the things I am unhappy with. It is optimism and faith that allow me to challenge myself and refuse to take lifes’ stumbles as a reason not to get back up again.
Right on Lahle!
Fall down seven times, stand up eight!