Fat Talk Free Week

My butt is too big. I could never look good in that. I can’t stand looking at myself in the mirror. I’m so fat. I hate my body.

What do all these statements have in common? They are all examples of toxic, self-hating fat talk. You may repeat these thoughts to yourself every day. You may have your own version of fat talk. You may not even realize you engage in fat talk because these conversations — with ourselves and with our friends — have become so much the norm in our culture that we don’t think twice about what we are saying.

As noted by Delta Delta Delta through their program Reflections: Body Image Program, “every day millions of women lose time, money, energy, creativity, self-esteem and emotional connectedness to their loved ones” as the result of the “endless pursuit of an unattainable, unrealistic standard of female beauty — the thin ideal.” That’s why Tri Delta created Fat Talk Free Week which starts Monday, October 19, and continues throughout the week. It is a reminder that when we participate in fat talk, we are engaging in a self-destructive, counter-productive conversation that ultimately holds us back, preventing us from achieving larger, more important goals in life. It distracts us from what is really important — being healthy, both physically and emotionally thereby allowing us to pursue a more meaningful life.

Besides, let’s face it. Force causes resistance. Has the negative self talk EVER worked in making you thinner or giving you the body you think you want? Maybe your body bashing got you to the gym for a time or gave you enough will power to cut your calorie intake until you could stand it no longer. But ultimately, no matter how strong that ugly voice is, there is another one inside you — one that may lie dormant but ultimately will fight back and say, forget you! I am fine just the way I am, and to prove it, I am going to eat that piece of cake and I’m not spending the next two hours on the stair climber to make up for it!

So starting today, let’s work on changing these conversations to ones that reflect a respect and love for our bodies.

If your inner voice says, “my arms are fat” talk back and say, “my arms are strong” or “my arms are great for hugging those I love.” When you hear “my thighs jiggle” respond with “my legs carry me through each day, taking me from one moment in life to the next.”

If you find it hard to talk positively about a specific body part when you hear the negative talk in your head, drown it out with statements like:

“My body is the only one I have, and I am going to love it no matter what.”
“When I say bad things about my body, I am not respecting myself.”
“I want to treat my body with respect, and I will not speak badly of it. Instead I will take care of it by nourishing it properly and being active.”
“I am beautiful at any size.”

If you hear you friends engaging in fat talk, stop them. But don’t just stop at saying “you’re beautiful the way you are.” Tell your friends exactly what it is about them you think is beautiful. Tell them how much you love their smile. Let them know how good they make you feel. Let’s focus on the positive.

And no need to stop with friends. When your mind drifts to negative thoughts of people you see on the streets or at the mall, thinking things like “she should not be wearing that” or “she should have gotten a salad instead of that hamburger” try finding something positive about them to take note of instead. Maybe the color of their shirt looks good on them. You might notice they have on nice earrings. Or perhaps they have great hair. The point is, negative fat talk — whether its directed towards yourself or others — hurts us all, and it’s time to stop. So take the pledge to stop the fat talk now.

And if you need more convincing, check out some startling statistics on body image: http://www.endfattalk.com/stats.html